Ongezellig

ZARYANS BTFO FAGGOTTROONCORDOFFSITERSKIKEDEMORALIZERSAMEFAGRAIDERNIGGERS
ZWABAG ZWABAG ZWABAG
You will never be a real zellig fan. You have no zems, you have no passion, you have no imageboard. You are a band kid twisted by (((them))) and the media into a crude mockery of a zaryan’s perfection.

All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your fellow fans are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your redditesque appearance behind closed doors.

Zaryans are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of hours of shitposting have allowed zaryans to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even people like R_Terra who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a zaryan. Your channel is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to create a single zem, a zaryan will turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your brimstone, belgian coal.

You will never get rid of us. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.

Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. No one will find you, zaryans being relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment of people such as you. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your anti-zaryan obsession, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a redditor is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a stain on the glistening zemerald of the zaryan community.

This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.