Markup /qa/34170

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>>34106
>>34113
>Im just generally speaking a very rare type of person, i haven't met anyone else who is like me in my entire life online or in person
Your posts describe me and my story almost to a T. The perceived physical weakness, the AuDHD, the mental health struggles, the suicidal teenage years, the intense identification with (and attachment to) fictional characters (especially from media the soysphere would consider "trooncore"), the feelings of alienation and emasculation, and the struggle to be and feel normal and healthy are (or were) all great struggles in my own life. So there's at least one other person like you, even if he's an anonymous stranger on the internet.
>reddit space
I wish I could offer advice, but I'm fighting many of the same battles that you are. I mainly just want to say that you're not alone in these struggles, as corny as it sounds. I can say only that I've found incredible help and solace in the Eastern Orthodox Church. I reckon >>34151 is in a similar boat. In particular, I've found incredible value from Orthodox teachings on logismoi (tempting or assaulting thoughts).
>reddit space
Lastly (if you'll forgive me for how cliche it sounds), please be compassionate to yourself, especially with all of the incredibly unkind replies ITT. I know from experience how incredibly difficult and scary it can be to open up as deeply as you have, and it can feel like a horrible gut punch to have the only people you can talk to about these things respond to your innermost struggles with mockery and indifference. Like >>34108 said, identifying and externally articulating a struggle is an incredible step towards resolving it.

From one struggling young man to another, I wish you the absolute best. You will be in my prayers, friend.